Saturday, July 17, 2010

Mud, bath, and flowers.



Her raincoat is on, umbrella in her hand.  Her barefeet in July mud splashing, laughing, squishing.  
My girl.  
I leave her to her fun.  Then, "mommy, I'm ready to come in now" Me- "Ok, stand on the big rock I'll get a soft towel".  I wash her feet, unpeel wet layers.  "How about a bath?" I ask "Yes!" she says, "Can I eat a peach after a bath?" "You can eat a peach during a bath!".  Up the stairs, I run the water, little feet go in the tub, bubbles go in.  "Mommy-"  "Yes?", "I love you more than a bath!", I reply "I love you more than bubbles!"  I love this game of her cup of love running over.  I think she is a blessing.  I leave her to her fun, door open I can hear her playing.
Downstairs I read the article about the Saussers past debt, jail time, divorce.  I sigh and share it with Ted.   Upstairs- "Mommy, I'm doo-oone!".  Upstairs she entertains me with a bath puppet show. I dry her off, we tiptoe out of her room, J is sleeping.  Downstairs we talk about the Sausser mess with Shayne.  He reads James 5 and hands me a forgiveness sheet.  I need it.  "Mommy does your stomach hurt?"  "Yes, how did you know that?" I say  "Because mine does too".  "My heart does too"  I say.  "Will you pray for mommy?"   This takes a little convincing.  But she closes her eyes and prays, "God, help mommies tummy feel better and her heart, and give her flowers, and tell her you love her".  We open our eyes "You know why I pray for God o give you flowers?" she asks "Why?".   "Because you are beautiful like flowers and you smell like them when you get out of the shower".  "Do I smell like them now?"  "No!".


50.  For four year old toes splashing in mudd
51. when little cups run over with love
52.  for the"I love you more than" game
53.  For her discerning heart
54.  For your truth through those I love
55.  For everything I need and more than enough
56.  For ordaining a  child to comfort me and give me strength today

Friday, July 16, 2010

45. Cute bear and lion on the couch laughing
34.  Chorus of Chinese ladies giggling and talking with a talkative Dorathea
35.  Running under the stars
36. Saving 75.00 on a 65.00 grocery bill
37.  Child's pose with Dorathea
38.  Sit ups a baby on my feet and on in the air
39.  Husband who cleans bathroom and goes on a hunt for flies
40. Father-Daughter Tennis
41. Little boy who stands at the door and says bye bye when you put his shoes on
42. Dorathea tickling Jonathan with bear paws of her bear costume,

43. Boys with a lion costume on who wag their tails as they hug you
29. Walking to Charlie's Chinese
30. Coffee Toffee Ice Cream after a run
26. The smell of sweet summer air at night

Women friends

Day at the lake I wave at a group of friends and unload the kids beside their beach towels.  I see myself in your mirrored sunglasses and I look huge, every other mom looks like the cute, small, women they are.  I try to untangle the comparison thoughts from my mind.  "No, I am myself, I am beautiful".  We sit and talk parenting and I soak up all the negative traits we talk about as my own parenting style.  "No we are all different and perfect for our own children"  I fight back the attacker in my head.  I begin to stop focusing on my faults and she the real beauty of these women.  Each ordained to mother our little individuals.  Each with beauty they wear on their sleeves and beauty that is uncovered the deeper into their spirits you go.  I feel more beautiful reflected in their mirrored beauty.  We laugh, we talk, we share, we kiss crying babies.




27. Clean and Asleep babies home from the lake
28. Time to breath
31.  Many Girlfriends by the lakewater
32. Babies gathered around us in the sand
33. "Mom, I had so much fun today!"- Dorathea
44. Old friends catching up in my living room with friendships that never are old
46. Holly Myers' giggle
47. Lovely women friends who don't bite at, talk about,  or make fun of each other.- such safety in that!