From October 2011

I lay under the covers this bright Saturday morning afraid to get out of bed.  What if today is the day the police put the eviction notice on the door?  I pray "God help show me what you want me to see today".  Eyes closed I see myself held in his great hands.  I feel safe and loved.  I remember that nothing in the world can take me from that spot.

 "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea," Psalm 46

I may be moved out of my house, but God, my home, is still present in me.  So what am I afraid of?  And my children, my husband will always have that home in me.

I wake up, make coffee and drink with my bible open.  "Oh lord, I don't know what is going to happen, give me vision".  I open up to the passage about Hezikiah who was a good king

2 Chron 31:20-32:1 "This is what Hezekiah did throughout Judah, doing what was good and right and faithful before the LORD his God. In everything that he undertook in the service of God’s temple and in obedience to the law and the commands, he sought his God and worked wholeheartedly."

It makes me think of Ted who is a good husband and father, who is working so hard to provide for us but thinking his efforts are not good enough.  And yet he still fights for us, holding out hope that it will all work out. And telling me over and over that we will make it through all this, even when he is battling with himself. Like Hezekiah talking to his people;

2 Chron 32:6-8  “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged because of the king of Assyria and the vast army with him, for there is a greater power with us than with him. With him is only the arm of flesh, but with us is the LORD our God to help us and to fight our battles.” And the people gained confidence from what Hezekiah the king of Judah said

 I can hear the enemy in my head too.  "I already have you.  You will lose your home and your family will fall.  You are already in my hands, how will you be able to escape what will happen to you now?".  Hezekiah heard the enemy speak out loud as well.  His enemy yelled back;

"On what are you basing your confidence, that you remain in Jerusalem under siege? When Hezekiah says, ‘The LORD our God will save us from the hand of the king of Assyria,’ he is misleading you, to let you die of hunger and thirst….  “Do you not know what I and my fathers have done to all the peoples of the other lands? Were the gods of those nations ever able to deliver their land from my hand?  Who of all the gods of these nations that my fathers destroyed has been able to save his people from me? How then can your god deliver you from my hand? "

I close my eyes again.   The foreclosure looks like a fire burning our house down, and we in the middle of it watching it all go.  But God is with us, and so instead of melting with it all we are glowing like gold.

 "Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.

I have called you by name; you are mine...

When you walk through the fire of oppression,

you will not be burned up;

the flames will not consume you

3For I am the LORD, your God,

the Holy One of Israel, your Savior...

13“From eternity to eternity I am God.

No one can snatch anyone out of my hand." - Isaiah 43

So here the Keys go, through the fire.  But we are together here, our family, and God. I don't know what the other side will be like, but I can tell you that God is using the calamity the enemy has brought to divide my love of people from my love of things.  And if the fire comes again, I won't be as afraid.  Because the things I have that are really good won't be snatched out of his hands.